I am seeing how constantly the Lord draws me back to Himself. He is truly patient. I think about this verse, and it moves me. How often God reveals to me how I have offended Him, yet He chooses to forgive that sin. I think about His discipline, which to me is His ultimate form of kindness. After all, God disciplines those He loves (Hebrews 12). God disciplines me so gently, so patiently. He loves me enough to work in my life, to transform me into someone new. What other god loves like this?
So often I wrestle and fight, and as I have written before, I always feel God's delight in those moments. Even as they are so hard, and I hurt and I kick and I scream, those battles are my old self fighting against the new one, the one God has created out of the rubble of my life. And oh the beauty that exists there! I know that as God works in me, disciplines me, and allows me to have those struggles, He is triumphant. He is urging me on, encouraging me, molding me here and smoothing me there, laughing in victory.
Right now, the Lord is soothing my soul. He is giving me rest, reminding me of Himself and of the truth to which I cling with all my strength. He is gently calling me to Himself, easing my spirit and gentling my heart. After this summer, my heart is worn a little around the edges, and God is reminding me of some things of which I desperately need to be reminded.
Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine! Oh, what a foretaste of glory divine! Heir of salvation, purchase of God, born of His Spirit, washed in His blood - this is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the day long! That is the truth I am holding onto, and of which God is reminding me.
Whether it is in those moments of fighting or in the gentle ministrations of His spirit, God shows me His kindness, and it leads me to repentance. He is restoring me bit by bit, and I am not the same as I once was.
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